South Asian weddings are full of life, colors, lively rituals, delicious food, and joyful celebrations. Events like Mehndi, Mayun, and Muklawa are celebrated across different countries. Among these, Dholki is another exciting pre-wedding event, especially popular in India, Pakistan, and Bangladesh, and celebrated in some communities in Nepal and Sri Lanka.

Since Dholki is such an important pre-wedding event, let’s talk all about it; what is a dholki event, and what are the perfect outfits for the bride and guests to make the celebration even more special.

What is a Dholki Event?

The word “Dholki” comes from the word “dhol”, a type of drum that plays an important role in the event.  So, the dholki is a small drum played with hands to create different beats. Women who knew how to play it were highly valued, as it takes skill to produce the right rhythm.  

In the past, Dholki was a simple, home-based celebration where family and friends gathered to sing, practice wedding dances, and enjoy the festivities. Unlike today, wedding invitations didn’t specifically mention the Dholki event—it was an informal yet cherished tradition. In villages, the Dholki often started weeks before the wedding, mainly as a girls’ event. The bride’s friends and cousins would come together after dinner, singing traditional songs late into the night. 

Back then, people didn’t focus much on planning—just music, laughter, and fun. But today, with everything becoming more commercialized and social media capturing every moment, planning plays a bigger role. Many now turn to a wedding planner to handle details like food, décor, and lighting, especially when long-distance guests arrive days before the wedding. 

Home-based vendors also add more color and fantasy to the celebrations. They create themed setups, decorate the Dholki, design personalized cakes, and arrange elegant flowers, making the event even more special. 

What is Dholki in a Pakistani Wedding?

Pakistani weddings share many similarities with Indian weddings because, before partition, both were part of the same region. Many old traditions are still followed, even though they have no roots in Islam. When exploring wedding traditions across different cultures, it’s clear that customs evolve over time, blending cultural heritage with modern influences. 

If someone asks, “What is a Dholki in Islam?”, the answer is that Dholki has no religious significance. In Islam, music is generally discouraged, while singing with the duff (a simple drum) was allowed during happy occasions in the time of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). However, modern wedding celebrations have become much more elaborate, with singing, dancing, and music playing a big role in events like Dholki. 

What happens on a Dholki Night?

Now after the discussion on what is a Dholki, let’s talk about what happens on a Dholki night. Many people wonder, “Are Dholkis for girls only?” Historically, the sangeet ceremony in Indian weddings is a female-only event organized by the bride and groom’s families to celebrate the bride before the main wedding.  

After Partition, this tradition evolves into the Dholki event in Pakistani weddings. Traditionally, it is a celebration mainly for women, where they sing, dance, and play the drum. However, in some communities, men also join in, especially for the music and festive fun. 

On a Dholki night, the bride’s family and friends gather to celebrate with music, singing, and dancing. The main highlight is the dholak, a small drum played to create lively beats. Women sing traditional songs, often teasing the bride and groom, and dance in circles to the rhythm. It is a joyful and lively gathering filled with laughter, excitement, and bonding before the big wedding day. Here’s a breakdown of what typically happens during this lively event: 

1. Opening Ceremony

The evening begins with an opening prayer from a family member for the bride and groom’s happy life and thanking everyone for coming and celebrating together. This sets the tone for the event, creating a warm and welcoming atmosphere. 

2. Music and Singing 

Music is the heart of the Dholki night. Women take turns playing the Dholki drum, creating a lively rhythm for the celebration. They also use a spoon to tap on the drum, and if a Dholki is not available, they use a flat steel pot (parat) instead. Women sing traditional songs, which are usually fun and full of humor. Some songs playfully tease the bride and groom, while others bring back happy memories for everyone. 

3. Kikli and Gidda 

Besides singing, dancing is another key part of the Dholki event. Women dance to the beat of the Dholki, moving in circles or following the rhythm of the songs. Kikli and Gidda are examples of such dances. So, when someone asks, “What is a Dholki?” We can say it includes lively dances like Tappey and Gidda. 

4. Teasing and Fun 

A Dholki event is also known for its playful teasing. The songs often include light-hearted jabs at the bride and groom, teasing them about their upcoming marriage in a fun and cheerful way. Guests often tease the bride, and sometimes even the groom, through songs or short performances. This playful atmosphere brings a lot of excitement to the event and creates a joyful, relaxed vibe for everyone involved. It’s a time to laugh, bond, and celebrate the happiness of the couple in a light-hearted manner. 

5. Traditional Food and Drinks 

Like any wedding celebration in Pakistan, food plays a key role in the Dholki. Hosts serve traditional delicacies and snacks, including samosas, pakoras, chana chaat, kebabs, and sweets like gulab jamun and jalebi. They also offer refreshments such as lassi, tea, and fruit drinks to keep guests hydrated and energized for the festivities. 

In villages, people serve specific snacks during Dholki and Mayun, including makhaney, boiled wheat (ghungniyan), batasey, and puffed rice. 

6. Gifts and Prayers 

As the Dholki continues, the bride’s family often gives small gifts to the women in attendance, such as jewelry, bangles, gajrey, sweets, or other mementos to remember the event. There is also a time for prayers, where the bride’s family prays for her happiness, health, and a prosperous marriage. This spiritual moment adds depth and meaning to the event. 

Modern Trends in Dholki Celebrations

While the essence of Dholki remains the same, modern weddings have introduced new trends to the celebration. Some of these include:

1. Themed Decorations

Today, many families decorate the venue with colorful backdrops, fairy lights, and floral arrangements. Some popular themes include: 

• Traditional Mughal Theme – Inspired by royal aesthetics, with rich colors and elegant decor. 
• Bohemian Theme – Featuring rustic elements, fairy lights, and floral setups. 
• Bollywood Theme – Focused on vibrant Bollywood-style decorations and dance performances. 

2. Personalized Touches

Many families now hire home-based vendors to add creative elements to the event, such as: 

• Customized Dholkis – Painted or decorated drums matching the theme. 
• Personalized Cakes – Featuring wedding-related designs and messages. 
• Flower Arrangements – Adding elegance to the setup. 

3. Professional Singers and DJs

Instead of casual singing, some families invite professional singers or DJs to enhance the entertainment. This makes the Dholki night feel like a grand event rather than just a small gathering.

What to Wear to a Dholki?

When we talk about marriage and its events, questions like what to wear on Dholki as a bride or guest. Or what is a Dholki outfit specifically? Choosing the right outfit is key to looking great at the celebration. Lehengas with flowing skirts give a graceful vibe, while an elegant Anarkali suit offers timeless charm. It’s important to pick a style that suits your body type and makes you feel confident and comfortable. 

In the past, Dholki was a smaller, family event, so women from the neighbourhood didn’t typically wear special dresses for it. Since it often took place days before the wedding, there wasn’t enough time to prepare elaborate outfits. However, nowadays, the bride, her family, and close friends tend to wear new, stylish dresses to mark the occasion. 

When picking your Dholki outfit, go for bright, cheerful colors like rich reds, deep blues, and golds. Choose comfortable, breathable fabrics so you can enjoy singing, dancing, and celebrations without any hassle. 

Wrapping Up

Now that we’ve discussed what is a Dholki, it’s up to you to decide whether you want a familial, intimate event with just close family and friends or to follow modern trends and create a more extravagant celebration. 

No matter how you choose to celebrate, the essence of a Dholki night remains the same—it’s a time for joy, bonding, and creating memories. The music, the laughter, and the spirit of togetherness make every Dholki night unforgettable. So, whether you’re going for a classic, private event or a modern twist, you can be sure that what is a Dholki will always be synonymous with love and celebration.