Pros and Cons of Arranged Marriage

Arranged marriages are a common way of finding life partners in many cultures. People have different opinions about them, some positive and some negative.

As time passes and social media grows, people see arranged marriages differently. Some think it is forced and out of date. While others believe it is good because it follows religion and family values. So, it’s important to understand arranged marriage pros and cons to get a clear view. 

What is an Arranged Marriage?

An arranged marriage is when families or others choose a bride and groom instead of the couple choosing each other. The families take the lead in finding a good match based on things like social status, religion, caste, compatibility, or profession. Once they agree on a match, the couple usually meets and gets to know each other before marriage. But in many cases, the final decision to marry comes from the families, though this is slowly changing today.

Arranged Marriage Pros and Cons

Arranged marriages still have an important place in many cultures around the world. People still encourage and accept it because it brings respect and social approval for a stable marriage. Both parents take full responsibility for the marriage. Here are some arranged marriage pros and cons. Let’s take a look. 

Advantages of Arrange Marriage

Love marriages vs arranged marriages has been a long-standing debate. While both have their pros and cons, here are 10 reasons why arranged marriages are a good choice for many couples.

1. Experience of Parents

Usually, parents have more life experience than their children. Since they have seen their child grow up, they know their likes, dislikes, and habits. This helps them choose a partner who may be a better match for their son or daughter. Sometimes, parents even notice things about their child that the child may not know or be sure about, which helps them make better decisions.

2. Assurance of Social Status

Arranged marriages often help match people from the same social background. It’s a fact that marriages are usually more successful when both partners come from similar lifestyles. A girl from a well-settled family may find it hard to adjust in a modest home, and the same goes the other way around. 

In Islam, the word “Kafu” describes this idea. Kafu means equal, similar, or a good match. It means the man and woman who marry come from the same social level and background. This creates better understanding and helps build a happy relationship between husband and wife. 

3. Family Support and Guidance

One of the benefits of arranged marriage is that there is less pressure on the couple. Families help choose the right partner. The couple receives support, advice, and guidance from both sides, which is one of the key benefits of arranged marriage. This support helps create a better understanding and a strong, stable relationship.

4. Community Support

When talking about arranged marriage pros and cons, community support is important. In South Asian countries, it matters even more. Your community approves and supports you. This support helps you overcome problems in marriage and gives you a sense of belonging. Your community can also help if any difficulties come up later.

5. Cultural Preservation

Arranged marriages help keep culture and traditions strong. Families follow old customs when choosing partners, which helps keep their culture alive. For example, in some communities, families choose matches within their own culture to make sure traditions continue. Today, when people marry from different cultures, many face problems because their traditions and ways of life are different.

6. Long-Term Commitment and Stability

One of the positives of arranged marriage is that both people usually enter with serious intentions and a strong commitment. This helps create long-lasting and stable relationships. Couples work together to face problems instead of giving up quickly.

7. Better Compatibility

One of the key benefits of arranged marriages is that families carefully consider important factors like habits, values, lifestyle, and background to find a partner who truly fits well. This thoughtful matching helps create a stronger bond between the couple. Also, make it easier for them to understand and support each other in daily life. 

8. Less Pressure on the Couple

Families find the match, so the couple can take their time to get to know each other. After marriage, when they become parents, their families help take care of the children. This support reduces stress and makes life easier for the couple. In the debate of direct marriage proposals vs family involvement, this shows how family involvement can offer long-term support and stability.

9. Guidance During Challenges

In South Asian families, elders actively help couples solve problems, offering advice and support during difficult times. Which is one of the advantages of arrange marriage.

10. Lower Risk of Divorce

Because families carefully choose partners and actively support the marriage, arranged marriages often have lower divorce rates. In Pakistan, where family involvement is strong, couples receive ongoing guidance and help from their elders, which encourages them to work through problems instead of separating. This family support creates a stable environment that helps marriages last longer compared to many love marriages where couples may face challenges alone.

Disadvantages of Arranged Marriage

After discussing the positives of arranged marriage, let’s take a look at some of the cons. 

1. Love May Not Be a Factor 

Arranged marriages have some benefits, but they also come with problems. One big downside is that love is often missing. 

Sometimes, the couple may get along, but they might not feel strong emotions for each other. This can lead to a loveless marriage. which is sad for many, as people often hope to marry someone they truly love and enjoy spending time with. Arrange marriage doesn’t always include this important part.

2. Higher Divorce Rates

Arranged marriages can sometimes lead to higher divorce rates, especially if love is missing. Often, parents don’t talk to their children before choosing a partner, so the children feel pressured to marry. Later, they may act like enemies, and the marriage ends in divorce. 

Sometimes, partners try to escape their unhappy marriage by moving to another country, hoping for a better life. Even if they remain in a relationship, many may not feel happy. 

3. Lack of Trust 

In arranged marriages, the husband and wife often come from families that know each other well. If one partner has had a past relationship or affair, it can cause a lack of trust between them. 

Without trust, it becomes hard to keep the marriage strong because mistrust can break the bond between husband and wife. 

4. Limited Personal Choice 

In arranged marriages, family members often decide who a person will marry. This limits the individual’s freedom to choose for themselves. Many prefer pasand ki shadi (love marriage) for this reason, as it gives them the right to choose their own life partner. Because when people don’t have control over this important decision, they may feel powerless.

5. Stigma and Cultural Expectations

In some cultures, people face judgment if they do not take part in arranged marriages. Society puts pressure on them to follow these traditions. This makes people feel forced to agree, and they may feel stuck because of these cultural rules.

Endnote

Arranged marriage pros and cons come with their own highs and lows. The positives of arranged marriage work for some but not for others. In the end, it’s all about finding what feels right for you and your happiness. Keep it real, keep it honest!